Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Rubber Band Snap Face Lift

Yep,  I finally went to the plastic surgeon's office today for my consultation.

My first impression was that the building the doctor was in was REALLY OLD and not attractive.  When I walked inside the front door, I was shocked at the disrepair of the place.  I tried to walk into what I thought was the door, and it had a big sign taped on it to go to a different door.  It didn't say WHICH door, however.

A lady noticed my confusion, and she pointed to the door I was supposed to go in.  The waiting room was not very nice.  Old chairs and a small TV and just not what I expected for a Plastic Surgeon's offices.  The girls behind the window were all very pretty and nicely dressed.  There were boxes on the floor around their desks with things in disarray.  I thought it was very strange, and I thought about just sneaking back out and leaving, but I didn't.

In a few minutes, Vanessa appeared at the window and asked me to come back.  I walked into her exam room and noticed it wasn't in the greatest shape either.  The front of one of the drawers was hanging by a thread.  One of the cupboard doors would not close all the way.

The exam room did have a very clean bed with white linens on it, and I was ready to jump on it and get started.  She said, "Oh, you need to sit over there."  So I sat "over there", and she asked me to tell her about myself.

Was she KIDDING!?  That could take hours.  I asked what she wanted to know.  She said she wanted to know what I wanted done and what I had already had done.  Well, I had just filled out FOUR PAGES with all that information on it.  I suppose it was to feed the shredder breakfast.  Nobody actually READ it?

While I was filling out the papers in the waiting room, there was a looooooooong program playing on the TV about some kind of new thing they do to your face.  I THINK it was called Ultherapy, but I could be wrong.  A lot of movie stars have it done according to the blurb on the TV.

So, I asked Vanessa about the procedure they were playing on the TV.  She explained that it was something another person did -- the P.A. to the surgeon maybe -- and it was expensive.  I asked HOW expensive.  She said it started at $1,600 for the lower part of your cheeks.  If you do under your chin, it is another $1,000 and if you did below that down onto your chest it was another $1,400.

That is a lot, but it is still a LOT less than a face lift.

I asked her if it was painful and if they put you to sleep.  NO, they don't put you to sleep.  They give you a Valium.  She said the procedure felt like someone was snapping you with stretched rubber bands deep in your skin.

Well, THAT certainly sounds pleasant!!!

I asked her HOW LONG one must endure this treatment.  She said three hours.

I thought maybe I might look good with a lot of wrinkles all over my face after all!

The surgeon's P.A. came in to look at the two scars I want removed.

That didn't go well either.

She looked at them and said, "Well, we could do it, but they might heal just as badly as the ones you already have because it is hard for wounds to heal in the lower leg."

Great!  WHY was I even there?

The pretty blonde P.A. left.  I told Vanessa I would like to just have the Micro-Dermabrasion done, and could we get started?

OF COURSE NOT!  I would have to REschedule that for another time.

When I left, I asked where the ladie's room was.  I went into the ladies' room, and as I always do, I reached for the tp roll to cover the toilet seat with tissue.  As I started to unroll the tissue, the whole thing came FLYING off of the holder and landed across the room!  The round thing fell behind the toilet.

I thought to myself, "Good Heavens!  This Plastic Surgeon must not make much money, or he spends it everywhere but here."  I was praying the toilet wouldn't explode when I flushed it!

Vanessa was putting some samples and some flyers into a small bag for me just before I left.  I noticed more messes around where she was, and I mentioned that the building wasn't very nice.  She said, "Oh, we KNOW!  It is HORRIBLE!"

Turns out they are moving to a new building in November.  I was really glad to know that.

I was kind of low when I left there thinking I would just live with the usual aging issues and quit trying to fix them.  I called my husband and told him.  He was thrilled, of course, because he doesn't want me to have anything done.  I told him that I had just saved him so much money, that I had to go buy something.  He laughed.

Other than that, I have made a new blouse, and I'm going to cut out a couple more.  I need some tops that FIT ME since I've lost weight.  Everything I put on just HANGS on me or poofs open at the top.

Be back soon.

Hope all of you are having a wonderful week.  I am missing my hubby, and he is missing me.  How WONDERFUL to still be in love after 40 years of marriage.  I hear of horrible marriages so often, and I am so very thankful for mine.

Hugs, Joy


  1. Goodness!! When I read your first sentence, I thought you have now turned all worldly....! Imagine!! Joy going to a plastic surgeon!! Horrors!!! So glad with your husband that you did not do it. Aging gracefully without succumbing to the devil's vices is a gift from the Lord. Carol

  2. LOL. My ORIGINAL reason for going to the PS was to have two scars removed from the bottom of my leg. Turns out, they can't even do that.
    Hugs, Joy


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