Monday, July 2, 2012

All Because I'm Old

It is 7:30 PM and I was just browsing around the Pioneer Woman's website.  I do not know how on earth she does all the things she does.  Her website is jam-packed full of everything!  You can really learn a lot about photography and PhotoShop there.  She is even doing a "Dear Abby" thing.  That sure would not be for me.  I would hate to give someone advice -- and have them use it -- and then something horrible happened because of it.  Of course, if someone ASKS you for advice -- and you give it -- and they take it -- I suppose it is their problem after that.

We went to the Skin Clinic today.  When I called last week to make an appointment for myself since Jerry already had one to get the stitches out of his nose, I got some looney girl on the phone.  It must have taken her 20 minutes to make my appointment.  She said they were SWAMPED on July 2nd, and she had 3 people in every time slot, and she didn't know if she could even get me in at all.  Finally, she decided I could come at 11:30 to the lazer person -- 11:45 to the freezer person -- and Jerry at 12:00 to get his stitches out.

So, today is the day, July 2nd.  First thing this morning I get a phone call saying the lazer girl is sick.  That makes a total of about 3 years now I've been trying to get into see that girl!  It is ALWAYS something.  Remember my last appointment when I walked in and there were only dentists there?  

We have to go to Durant which is the same town the nearest glass company is in.  We decide to take the broken piece of glass from the hutch that the carpet guy broke and leave it at the glass company on our way to the doctor.  For some reason, I assume this is going to take an hour, so we leave really early. 

We go to the glass place, and the guy takes our glass and says to come back AFTER the doctor appointment. 

I said all that so you would know WHY we ended up getting to our doctor appointment an HOUR EARLY.  I told Jerry we would probably have to wait 2 or 3 hours because they were going to be so swamped with 3 people in every time slot.  He said he would rather go and just wait.  So we go to the NEW offices which are very nice -- no more dentists in them.  We walk in and the place looks like a Ghost Town.  NOBODY there except for one lady sitting in the waiting room and one lady behind a desk.  I sign our names on the register and announce that we are an hour early, and we go sit down.  We aren't there TWO MINUTES, and they call my name through the doorway.  I looked around to see if there was another "Joy" hiding somewhere.  Nope!  Only me.  I had Jerry get up and follow me, and we went into the exam room. 

As we were following the nurse into the exam room, some guy was pushing his way in the door with us.  I thought he was a confused patient.  I said, "Who are you?"  He said, "I am Doctor Harris."  That has NEVER happened before in my whole life! The doctor immediately tended to me and then Jerry.  We couldn't believe it.  Well, I should have.  That girl who made my appointment sounded like she was a brick short of a load, if you know what I mean!

I had drawn a picture of a woman's body outline -- front and back -- and then stood in the mirror and marked all the strange looking freckles on my body.  I pointed them all out to the doctor, and he proceeded to tell me that they were perfectly fine and that I was extremely old and that is why they were there EXCEPT -- Oh, Wait -- what is this?

He pointed to someplace under my left boob that I could not even see and said, "This looks suspicious!"  The nurse walked over with a foot long needle and poked it in me, and he opened up a fresh new razor blade tool of some sort and whacked the thing off of me!

I have felt faint ever since!  I tried to get Jerry to feel sorry for me, but he just laughs at me.  He says, "I am the WRONG person to come to for sympathy for that little thing!" 

You really can't blame him for feeling that way.

After the doctor was through chopping off my one dangerous freckle, he went after Jerry with a vengeance.  Poor Jerry.  He has had the entire back of his hands frozen over and over and over and over.  He has also had surgery on both of them to have some kind of cancer cut out.  He thought his hands looked pretty good.  In fact, he was just showing them to me yesterday and saying how good they were looking.  The doctor took that large bullet-shaped canister of freeze stuff and sprayed the back of Jerry's hands over and over in several places.  Jerry was saying, "I just had that done!"  The doctor didn't care. 

Then Jerry lifted his shirt so the doctor could look at a place on Jerry's shoulder, and I pointed out two moles on his side that I didn't like.  I told the doctor I would like those cut off.  Jerry said nothing.  The nurse proceeded to poke Jerry with the long needle, and the doctor took SCISSORS and cut them both off!  Jerry didn't flinch.  I thought I was going to pass out!  

Then we came back home.  Jerry went to work as though nothing ever happened.  I tried to take a nap two different times because I was queazy over my "surgery" that Jerry just laughs at, but my phone kept ringing.  I'm not good at naps anyway.  My mind never will turn off.

Jerry has those awful sores all over the back of his hands, but he is out painting a new muffler to put on his dozer.  I would have gladly doctored him and taken him dinner in bed.  No way!  He is like the Everyready Bunny -- he just keeps on going and going and going.....

Think I'll go over to his barn and check on him.  Hopefully, I won't pass out from my dangerous freckle removal.

Hugs, Joy

1 comment:

  1. You are so funny! I think you are kin to my Rose! To this day you'd think she was dying if she gets a hangnail. Everything requires a bandaid. I'm okay as long as I don't see my own blood. Then I feel faint. Someone else's blood doesn't bother me a bit, but my own and I get woozy.

    Hugs, Phylly


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Hugs, Joy